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~carolin54323:iconcarolin54323:

has eaten too much!  

  • Status: Member
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  • United Kingdom
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  • Deviant since Feb 9, 2005, 1:20 PM
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Cello, Money and Composing

Journal Entry: Fri Apr 18, 2008, 4:50 AM
  • Mood: Screwed
  • Listening to: My own dreadful composition
  • Reading: Evening in the Palace of Reason ~J. Gaines
  • Watching: Time's winged chariot bearing down on me
  • Playing: Not enough music for my own good.
  • Eating: I think I worked through food time...
  • Drinking: Water
I am stressed, I am very, very very stressed. I think I am going to throw things at the wall and yell if I get any more stressed. I was meant to have finished my composition a week ago, and have handed everybody their parts, and I'm 3/4 done, but not finished, and as I am trying to get a decent grade (like an A) on this, I'm being very painstaking and meticulous and trying to write actual music rather than just notes for college, but I've got to the point where I'm being less careful in favour of just getting it finished, and I'm trying to write this connecting section, a sunrise between the insects of the night, and the insects of the day, and it is NOT working.

I have a chord sequence planned and written out. I have a vauge idea of a melody, but I can't seem to turn that into music at the moment, it just comes out as humdrum and vaguely harmonious noise. it contains nothing. It doesn't even describe what I'm trying to convey in the shallowest terms. It doesn't even sound good. I am useless. I don't want to write glorious music, just something that will get me a good grade, and which I will not be filled with regrets about once it is done.

The thing is, I have 'good' (well, ideas I like) in my head, and I can hear them, and I know what I'm trying to do/ Sometimes my lack of ability to put onto paper what I see and hear in my head really, really frustrates me. I can't actualise my ideas, and that is very, very frustrating. I want the 'insect' parts to drop out and fade down to just the bass and violin lines, then build it back up gradually to the brightness of dawn. Then a bars rest, and then the concluding part, which is all really variations on the main theme, and which I've done most of the work for. I'm probably going to spice up the harmonies a little as they are currently a little too chirpy and twee. I know what I want to do. I'm just not successfully doing it.

Of course, people need their parts. They needed their parts last week. I need my parts, as I'm ending up being multitracked and playing 'cello and recorder in this due to lack of musicians. College have decreed I am doing a real instrument recording of my piece. This is a wonderful idea. If I had six hours a day practice time... I have a job, other things I;m studying, other things I have to practice for (like my recorder exam...), illustrations and art commissions, my job, my chores.... I have, as always, more demands on my time than ability to fill them. it does not help that I was feeling really rotten last week and couldn't do much work.

I really don't know what I'm going to do.

Oh, and more things... My 'cello is in need of repair, and the cost of said repairs is £130. I need to get my 'cello fixed urgently because i am meant to be playing her for the recording of my composition in a couple of weeks. (I've been handing out parts for the first two thirds of the piece, and everybody's practicing those two sections while I work on the last section.). I don't have £130. I have a lot less than that.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I read this over on Livejournal:
[link] On the dessication of music

Devious Information

  • Current Age: Who cares, I was born in the wrong century anyway.
  • Current Residence: There are stars on my ceiling, the sun guards my door and there's a Goddess in my window...
  • Interests: Creating, the environment and nature, the world around me, archaeology, art, music, fencing... Lots.
  • Favourite movie: The Lord of the Rings trilogy
  • Favourite band or musician: Beethoven, Karl Jenkins, Dead Can Dance, Mahler, Chopin, Liszt..
  • Favourite genre of music: If it sounds good, I'll listen, but my preference is for classical music
  • Favourite artist: My Mum, who is an artist. Leonardo DaVinci, William Blake, Mucha
  • Favourite poet or writer: Prof. J.R.R Tolkien, Umberto Eco, William Blake, J. Keats, J. Clare...
  • Favourite photographer: My Dad
  • Favourite style or digital art: Anything beautiful!
  • Operating System: I operate my life on a system of my own divising.
  • MP3 player of choice: iTunes + iPod
  • Shell of choice: Nautilus shell
  • Wallpaper of choice: I don't hold with walpaper. I'd rather paint the walls.
  • Favourite game: Hopscotch
  • Favourite gaming platform: Gaming? Me?
  • Favourite cartoon character: Chelsea Chattan from Clan of the Cats
  • Personal Quote: "Holy Fugue and Schubert!" and "I second that motion!"
  • Tools of the Trade: If it works, use it.

deviantART Notice

Devious Comments

~eruecco:iconeruecco: 4 hours 32 minutes ago
Wow... awesome gallery, great job you are doing :)
*Flusher:iconFlusher: 2 days 13 minutes ago
many thanks for the fav... great gallery :)

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bnag.
*AngelOfMelancholy:iconAngelOfMelancholy: 5 days 20 hours ago
Thanks for the fav!

:kiss:

--
"The emptiness annihilates all and nothingness takes its place."
~yamz66:iconyamz66: May 6, 2008, 7:45:17 PM
thanks for the fave!!

:hug:
~carolin54323:iconcarolin54323: May 5, 2008, 7:30:58 AM
How goes it with you? How has uni been? How is the music going? How is the Gamelan going?

--
I am the storm that must chose between the sky and the winds.
~carolin54323:iconcarolin54323: May 5, 2008, 7:30:30 AM
How goes it with me? How it goes for every college student at that time of year when exams loom. I handed in my assessed composition last week, and I have my end of year exams starting on the 22nd of may.

--
I am the storm that must chose between the sky and the winds.
~mitya:iconmitya: Apr 29, 2008, 12:20:32 AM
Heya! How goes with you? Sorry I've been so dreadfully uncommunicative for the past few months...
=eskimoblueboy:iconeskimoblueboy: Apr 23, 2008, 5:37:35 PM
:sun:
Thank you for adding Penguin to your favorites. :) Have an awesome day!:boogie:

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If I could tell the story in words, I wouldn't need to lug a camera. --Lewis Hine

:peace: :hug: :love:
~Eonex:iconEonex: Apr 19, 2008, 10:15:21 AM
Thanks for the fav! :-)
~monster242:iconmonster242: Apr 19, 2008, 5:18:35 AM
Thank you very much for the favs :)

--
My finger is on the button.push the button.....
school was destroyed :giggle:

Sorry for my English :(
~AlessandroLandi:iconAlessandroLandi: Apr 17, 2008, 9:53:56 AM
thanks sssou much.
(btw it has grown over and over, indeed! ^_^ )
*jim100bg:iconjim100bg: Apr 17, 2008, 5:50:53 AM
thanks for the fav :)

Buzz - :salute:

--
Good character is doing the right thing when no ones looking.

Death smiles at us all, Marines smile back!

:daprints: [link]
*nikkithebee:iconnikkithebee: Apr 14, 2008, 4:53:55 PM
Wow, holy crap! Thanks for the fave, though I feel completely unworthy of a favorite coming from someone with your caliber of talent. Jeez! Your art's fanTAStic!

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beedogs beedogs beedogs.
also [link]
~hankinstein:iconhankinstein: Apr 14, 2008, 8:29:43 AM
Hey thanks for stopping by and leaving all the comments! :D
:pirate: ARRRGH....

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Never ending sooooooda, aaaaaa--aa--aaa-aaa-aaa-aaa-aaa-aaa-aaaaaaahhh
=Athansor:iconAthansor: Apr 11, 2008, 5:14:06 PM
I think you should go for it! :D Isn't that part of the fun of being an artist--that rush you get, when something inspires you?! I love that! :D

--
I mean by a picture, a beautiful romantic dream of something that never was, never will be, in a light better than
any light that ever shone, in a land no one can define or remember, only desire & the forms divinely beautiful.
--E Burne-Jones
~carolin54323:iconcarolin54323: Apr 11, 2008, 12:05:01 PM
You've actually rather inspired me. I've a plan to try my hand at a similar sort of image, except I'm not really much of a photographer, and any photographs I take will end up as references for a painting.

--
I am the storm that must chose between the sky and the winds.
~baikolio:iconbaikolio: Apr 11, 2008, 11:31:22 AM
thanks for the :+fav:

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My Gallery: [link]
~Skolli:iconSkolli: Apr 11, 2008, 3:18:50 AM
Thank you for your coment :-)


And a nice gallery you got here :-D
*aixado:iconaixado: Apr 6, 2008, 2:24:59 PM Mood: Joy
thanks very much for the fav.Carolin, greetings!!!
~Eonex:iconEonex: Apr 6, 2008, 9:16:23 AM
THANKS for the fav! :-)
~ChiNoble:iconChiNoble: Apr 6, 2008, 6:33:29 AM
Thanks for the fave, much appreciated
=Athansor:iconAthansor: Apr 6, 2008, 2:02:51 AM
And your kind words are just really making me beam! :D :hug:

--
I mean by a picture, a beautiful romantic dream of something that never was, never will be, in a light better than
any light that ever shone, in a land no one can define or remember, only desire & the forms divinely beautiful.
--E Burne-Jones
*Mystik-Rider:iconMystik-Rider: Apr 4, 2008, 3:42:02 AM
:aww: :heart: Many thanks for all the :+fav: Really appreciate that! :iconmewfy137:

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:flagcanada:

:snowflake: :date: :snowflake:
Daniel and Anne are a couple who share the same passion: photography. They like to work as a team. However, in regard to the comments expressed here, that is me, Anne who wrote them. :giggle::wave: